The Switch That's Not a Switch

Oh hello, are you in a fucking funk and you don’t know why? Are you all fucked up and you do know why? Well, the “why” is important and you’ll need to track down that shit down at some point, but you don’t necessarily have to figure it the fuck out right this second to minimize your suffering and feel some fucking contentment for a change. In our mind is a switch that’s not really a switch but if you hit this fucking switch that’s not a switch then something extraordinary can happen, a revealing of perpetual self-satisfied awareness of awareness that has hitherto been shrouded by mundane perceptions of the most familiar. 

If you’re someone who suffers from PTSD, anxiety, depression or the more common malaise which is called being a fucking human, then you already know that facing and sorting that shit out is the primary work, it should be your one-pointed priority and yeah, it’s fucking hard work, but you know what’s harder? Letting your unprocessed trauma or subconscious poisonings that condition the thought process continue to degrade and warp and thereby take you and your potential for happiness with it. 1st things 1st, you’re not your fucking thoughts, unless of course you’ve decided that you are through the willful or default identification with thought. Identification is the issue. As I’ve mentioned before, observing thought, meditation and simply getting your meat tractor healthy or at the very least stop doing as much dumb shit are ways to start getting a handle on this shit so you can reveal your integrated potential for happiness. 

I’m not talking out of my ass here I’m telling you it’s possible, no matter how fucked you think you are it’s primarily perpetuated because you think you are hopelessly fucked and you’ve identified with your thoughts that think such and thus we suffer because we have mental events that create an emotional charge and a biochemical cascade of hormones and then we resist it. Suffering is an aversion to what is, through observation of thought we weaken identification and a spaciousness behind thought is revealed and perceived and guess what? In order for you to observe thought there has to be something other than or beyond thought that does the observing, that’s the "you" I’m actually fucking talking to. 

If you’re suffering, then congrats that means you’re ripe as fuck and ready to fall off the tree of feeling like shit. Motherfuckers who do the work as best they can and don’t give up and thus overcome suffering attain a state that not many can fully comprehend, the state is an intense appreciation just to feel fucking normal even if it’s just for one second. To simply get back to a baseline normality is so indescribably delightful that one doesn’t need to look for high ass highs or the next pleasure with which to out do the last pleasure that we’ve already gotten bored with or used to. It’s worth dealing with and healing your trauma because from this state of appreciation for nothing in particular- it allows for a glimpse to be had. 

If you have the gut fire of fortitude to transcend suffering, then you also have the possibility to transcend your own understanding of reality itself and what’s actually fucking going on. If you can neutralize your aversion to inner and outer situations and conditions then you can transcend suffering. If you can then turn your attention inward and observe everything you think you are as temporary fluctuations of an intangible electric event called thought and allow the possibility that you are none of it, that it’s something that occurs within the lucid field of you but is not solely you, maybe you’ll get that glimpse, that elusive fucking thing that every religion or spiritual practice is reaching for but rarely grasps simply because it’s so close and fundamental that we miss it. 

In fact, It’s closer than close, it’s the simplest, it’s the mind unbound by thoughts, it’s a pure radiant lucidity whose effulgence becomes noticed more than the supposed objects of reality that it illuminates. It is awareness of awareness, not aware of anything just fucking aware, awareness without the "of". It is like an emptiness that's somehow wakeful and I use the word empty because there are no words in our language to describe something whose attributes cannot be defined. It’s just fucking you, awake for fucks sake.

It’s something that I swear you are experiencing even now; you can deny it a million fucking times but it’s like denying the fact that you exist. The conscious ability to deny existence is the very fucking proof of existence itself so don’t be a dumbass. It’s just you, existing, the whole package- thoughts & emotions are not denied they are fully accepted within the field of you, an intimate emulsification of emptiness and thought forms, a non-dual blending that is somehow also perceivable as separate things. 

There is a fucking switch in your mind that’s not a switch. You are the original wakeful state of the entirety of existence as it peeps through the aperture of thought and as it passes through, it's covered in the thought web like a fucking spiderweb gets caught in your hair. You are the vast still ocean of original mind but through the intense buoyancy of the egoic construct we tend to mostly just splash around on the surface riding waves of fucking emotion up and down, peaks and trough and try not to fall off.
 
The switch that’s not a switch isn’t triggered by thoughts, thoughts are what keep you bound, thoughts are the addiction of the human minds egoic nature. The switch that’s not a switch is simply a remembering of your true natural state. It’s not a switch thrown through action but by relaxing. It’s not a switch anyone can throw for you or even teach you how, all one can do is point out that there is a perpetual awakened state, so obvious that it is hidden within your perpetual consciousness and obscured by the concept of mundanity, a serene radiant signal interrupted by our blindness to that which is familiar. When you see it you’ll realize it’s always been there and can never not be there. 

So 1st step is deal with your psychological, emotional & physical shit. 2nd step is begin to weaken the binding of this true state with temporary thoughts through observation and meditation. 3rd thing is don’t ever fucking give up no matter how hard or frustrating. Keep the fire of aspiration burning. 

That’s all you can do yourself, that’s as far as you can go with effort, an ego can’t dissolve itself, an eye cannot fucking see itself but through this process some strange grace may turn your eyeball inside out and you will experience yourself in the only way you can actually experience your true undiluted self, not on a piece of paper or in a video or as a thought or feeling or emotion. Only within your own experiential awareness can you be aware of yourself experientially. That’s the glimpse, then the practice is to be aware enough of thoughts, be they intense or be it that obscuring blanket of malaise or self judgement that creeps over the horizon of our experience that makes us forget ourselves.

 The switch that’s not a switch is a remembering of the glimpse without the process of thought weaving a narrative around it or the ego co-opting it and when you relax into that, you are that and it is the ultimate sustained satisfaction of existence within an eternal moment. Let me say that again, when you relax into that it becomes revealed that you are that. And by that I mean you, toodaloo.